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Looking after ourselves

Jenn4
Senior Contributor

how do you do things when you don't want to

Hey folks, i have bipolar and sometimes in a low i have literally 0 motivation to do anything at all. sometimes i don't even want to put the tellie on or anything, or do anything. just 0 motivation or care - how do people come back at that? how do you make yourself do things, like eat for example? thanks! 🙂

7 REPLIES 7

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

Hi @Jenn4 

I can relate to this, especially with study. I have tried working up the courage even if you don't feel like doing it. This is the really hard part because you usually don't want to do it at the time. 

I usually feel better afterwards. That's how you start off and then gradually you feel better.

I think a guided meditation on motivation could also work, and being aware of this and creating healthy habits and interests is good.

I hope you get a good answer 

🙂

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

cheers @Everan , will give it a crack for sure. thanks 🙂 

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

@Jenn4 That is an interesting one and something I have trouble doing. I can't wake up in the morning because of no motivation. I hope you get a good answer. : D 

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

@Supercoolguy yeah it's a doozy! hope you can get on top of it too

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

Hi @Jenn4 

 

I frequently have this issue. There have been days where I won't even drink water to avoid needing to get up to pee. I have found that stressing about the fact that I don't want to do anything often makes it so much harder to get up and actually do anything. I have started to set really basic simple daily goals for myself like eating and brushing my teeth. If I manage to get these done then I look at doing things like showering and doing a load of washing.

 

Making yourself feel guilty about doing nothing will only make things worse. Try treating every day like a fresh start and every task you do complete as a win. No matter how small that task may seem it is still an achievement. 

 

I also use a meditation app to help with both my anxiety and depression. Listening to someone else's voice often helps me "get out" of my own head even if it's only for a little while. That can be enough to get you out of bed and put one foot in front of the other which in itself is sometimes half the battle.

 

Hope this helps and I'm here if you ever want to talk.

 

May23 

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

Thankyou @May23 that is helpful and encouraging. I get the same with water sometimes! Or I think what is the point of drinking it if I'm just gonna pee it out and then need to drink more again haha. So weird. Brains are weird! I think setting really small goals and working up slowly is the way to do it. Thi is pretty new to me, not wanting to do anything or get out of bed has only been happening to me this year. Would love to chat more in future 🙂 Jenn

Re: how do you do things when you don't want to

Hi @Jenn4, something that made the world of difference for me was a tool I was taught in CBT called Behavioral Activation. There are loads of info available online, but the basics are the following:

When we are depressed, we lack motivation. This low energy, and lack of motivation makes us feel even more depressed, as we think of all the work we were supposed to be doing. All the things we should be doing. Instead, we stay in bed. So we get stuck in a loop.

Behavioural Activation, is basically, a tool to sit down and decide on two activities either a week in the beginning, or a day, if you're feeling up to it that you could do. One that would give you a sense of achievement, like taking a shower and another that would normally, bring you pleasure, like playing the piano.

The crux is to commit to doing these two activities whether you feel like you can or not. Then after you've done them, you rate how you feel afterwards on a scale from 1-10 on how much achievement and/or pleasure it gave you.

Doing this for a set amount of time (say 12 weeks) will in time lift your mood and has been proven to be even more effective than meds for depression. I can definitely testify to that, as it changed me and is my first coping tool when I feel my low mood coming on.

Hope this helps.
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