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GeminiLion
Senior Contributor

GeminiLion Roar

I am still learning about the Sane.org and the Forum setup. I finally had time to skim through the community rules this morning. 

 

I thought if I create my own thread which I can repeatedly use would be most manageable and less cluttered. Question: Would this work? or even encouraged.

 

So it is May 2019. And I have sent away the two lease agreements. I hope I made the right decision. Thanks to those you commented on my dilemma it did help me with my choices. I do have pdoc that I can call and when she is not busy she will return my call or her receptionist will help if it is possible. I'm pretty lucky to find a good pdoc that will take the time with me. Been seeing her for last few years now. Although we have exhausted all the learning stragedies now, instead just reminder how to use them when needed.

 

This month (like last month but come on, it was Easter), I am trying to get back into improving my diet and health. I have done successful second half last year but still more to go. I am 250 day AF (including DF which would be longer). I have no desire of breaking and going back to my old ways (I think I'm AF/DF for life now). 

 

My goals for this month is cutting back on the (SF) softdrinks and no more pretending to be the Easter Bunny. I usually walk avg 6000 steps per day most days. But I now understand I really should be doing 10,000 steps! I have trouble doing phsyical exercises due to my very painful right shoulder (and arm). This has also impacted on my studio work. But nevertheless I am going to be doing much more in both areas. For those who don't know, I am well-known artist in my community and have some recognition on a national scale. But my 15 minutes of fame was over a decade or more ago. Sometimes I think my art passion is lost but I do cling on to it. I am a born artist, and born into an artistic family.

 

I am very lonely. I did have friends in year 12 and continued for the next year or two after school when I came home from university. But everyone has drifted away from each other and gone seperate ways. I have trouble communicating with other people. I consider myself a Vulcan. I was diagnosed only a few years ago as Aspergers. But being an adult age 41 (now) I cannot get support and access to services (unless I paid fees myself). I guess I have gone through life anyway but if I had a blue box and could change the past.

 

I have have never been in a relationship and still consider myself a child without experience and maybe it is far too late for me. I have been on dating sites, apps and groups, but only bad experiences and have since deleted them all. I have considered giving another try but really really scared. And who will teach a 41 yo?

 

I am an only child in this marriage. But both my parents have married before a few times. Dad never remarried or form any new relationship with anyone when my Mother died when I was 21yo. I actually didnt know dad much back then, now I am his carer. I have an awkward relationship with dad's children as dad does himself. Some will not recognise me. Different story on Mother's side but they live afar including other countries. One of mum's son come out after a long marriage and is now known as Emily. I too have a secret, but I am just consider myself bisexual. I am unsure what I am. And I have learnt not to tell anyone, that I must keep it to myself. I am unsure anyway (I get attracted to both and might just be due to loneliness, or maybe I am asexual?).

 

I think I have written a novel. I hope this gets approved. And I see how this Sane.org helps me.  

18 REPLIES 18

Re: GeminiLion Roar

Hi @GeminiLion and welcome

Most people usually have a thread that they mainly use so that others can keep up with whats happening for you but its really whatever your comfortable with.


Im not familiar with what is happening with your lease but im glad that others here were supportive and have helped you with your choices.

Its good to hear you have some goals in place like cutting back on softdrinks and increasing the amount of steps you take. You meantioned though that you have trouble with exercise due to your shoulder, I wondered if you have seen an exercise physiologist? I have recently started seeing one due to my injuries making it hard as well and we have come up with quite a few manageable exercises which has surprised me since I have various body parts that I struggle with due to previous injuries etc.
Just a thought anyway, oh and the sessions are medicare rebated as well.

Its great that your an artist, have you seen our art threads? I can tag you if you like and introduce you to some of the other members who like arts and crafts. Have you tried out different forms of art to reignite your passion or perhaps tried other things like crochet, knitting or other sorts?

I feel rather lonely too, I dont have friends or family support and like you havent been in a relationship. Oh there was one small fling in high school but since then nothing.
Is it the dating sites your having trouble with or is it technology? Perhaps if it is technology you could join a few classes, most libraries offer free technology sessions.

To form friendships and help with lonliness, have you considered doing some volunteer work? Lots of op shops, and animal rescue places as well are often looking for helpers. You also meantioned being a carer (so am I for my pop) it can be quite an isolating job esp when its more at home care, have you thought about contacting carers australia or having a look on their site to see if theres any local carers groups you could join in with?

We also have an LBGTI thread if you need some support for your sexuality as well, like you I am attracted to both but havent really explored further with either of them. I dont find labels important though, your sexuality doesnt define who you are. I havent told anyone either, I dont really find it necessary to be honest.


Hope some of what im written has been helpful

Re: GeminiLion Roar

Hi @GeminiLion 

 

It is great that you have started a thread to keep us all updated with what is going on for you! I wonder, would it be a bit better suited for the 'Our Stories' area? This is where some members have some of their longer, check in on their journey threads - so wanted to see what you thought? 

 

Love that you are working towards goals as well! Keep us posted on how you are going with those. There is also a cool thread where you can get some support to keep on track with any goals and share motivations - Daily goals. motivation and check in

Re: GeminiLion Roar

@outlanderI use some of my health management plan on physio. I just in the last few days had to pay a specialist (huge difference in consultation to that of the public system but not cheap). I use to volunteer for years and years at a local regional art gallery and museum. I went overseas for a few months and came back and change of management happen, and had to reapply for my position which was rejected (and constantly rejected). There has been change of management again and someone said reapply but I was left a little sorrow. The new management (back then) would not give me a proper reference just a statement of service. No one would give me a solid reason why I was ousted (all I can think of is that my experience might have been a threat?). I don't have references which you need not only for work but volunteer roles too (catch 22). I have asked (I don't have any close friends) and besides one which isnt that great (simply written) no one seems willing (although I have not really asked anyone for a long long time). I usually make the contact up in hopes they don't follow through but I have been caught out before (then I use someone random which that person was not impressed or similar: usually because they really are just strangers).

 

I do conduct art workshops. I do not bother with art classes anymore as its a pain with people mucking you around from being late or not at all to thinking that they can get away with "free". Workshops are a large group, good for insurance costs, and quick hit to the pocket.

 

Dad lives down a few metres away in a different unit. I am there too much. It is almost 24/7 but my pdoc tells me to cut right back and say "no".   

Re: GeminiLion Roar

@LauzIs there a way to move the post to Stories. Or should I just restart?

Re: GeminiLion Roar

Hi @GeminiLion - no that's okay, we (the forums team) can move it across for you! Would you like me to do that for you?

Re: GeminiLion Roar

@Lauz Yes sure thanks.

Re: GeminiLion Roar

Heya @GeminiLion, that is all done for you Heart 🙂 

Re: GeminiLion Roar

I am reading a book called

"Invisible Orientation"

which goes into many aspects of sexuality ...

I identify as a bit bi ... and bit aspie ... I wonder if they are related.

Smiley Happy

Re: GeminiLion Roar

hi @GeminiLion
im not to sure if they are the same plan as i use a management plan for my physio as well. i would perhaps meantion it to your gp and ask if thats something your interested in of course but no pressure to do so.
i understand about tryin to find work with no references, it can be quite hard and sometimes embarrassing too.

well done on doing workshops. thats pretty cool. we dont have many workshops where i am and the ones that are run are usually pretty expensive.

i also understand how hard it is to cut back and say no as well. maybe carers aust can help with some supports for you and your dad as well.
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