Lived Experience Forum

[Wanda1]

I really struggle with maintaining all relationships, especially friendships. The only people l have stable relationships with are my husband, my 4 year old daughter, and my mum. Everyone else I mess things up with and push them away.

I'm 35 and I've always been this way, from childhood. I've just begun to see it's me, not anyone else. 

I don't know if this is anxiety, depression, or if I'm on the spectrum. I get overwhelmed easily and like being in control of my surroundings as a way of maintaining stability. 

Would really appreciate any advice, thank you. 

[nashy]

Hey there @Wanda1 thank you for sharing, despite this struggle please know you are not alone. Creating friendships is one of these things no-one really talks about but everyone tends to struggle with at some point (yep, even extroverts and seemingly successful people!).

I want to commend you on your self-awareness here. You've already pinpointed a few things that you feel may contribute, most definitely there is a tribe out there for you and peers you will bond with, you've taken the first step towards them by posting on our forums 🙂 It's great to hear you have kinship with your Mum, partner and Daughter. What are some strengths in these relationships that keep them sustained? It might sound strange, but there are people who sometimes cannot even manage relationships with family, perhaps you could pull some of the positives from these bonds and apply them to people you meet outside of this unit as well.

Are you engaged in any sports, hobbies or classes at the moment? Where do you usually meet people? We're here to listen, this is a space for you to reflect