Lived Experience Forum

[Mish_]

Hi, I came across this forum. I'm at a complete loss right now... almost to the point of being numb. I thought I could get some help and hear other others experiences.

This year has been a complete rollercoaster. For context about my situation, im in my early 20s and last year I was living at home with my parents, studying at university straight out of highschool.

Several things have happened since the beginning this year in order:

Lingering trouble with a father who emotionally and borderline physically abuses my mother. He manipulates the situation to better suit his reality and inflated ego. He has thrown hot food and kitchen utensils at my mother before, and it got to the point where my mother was considering divorce. 

Moving out from home for the first time with boyfriend of 6 months. It was fine in the beginning, until issues outside of the relationship such as mywork, covid and family financial hardships caused issues. He was unable to offer emotional support and often left me crying until early morning. and I felt more alone than ever, even while sleeping besides him. 

Starting work in healthcare at the climax of coronavirus in an unsupportive, clique workplace caused associated emotions of incompetency. I also felt isolated because I couldn't visit my mother and brother because I would be potentially putting family at risk, leading to first time experiencing such physical distance and isolation from family.

I also lost connection with friendships and my supporr group due to friends moving away for work

After 1 year of living together, discovering boyfriend was emotionally cheating with other girls. He said she was better to talk to because she didn't ask so many questions. While working through first instance, finding out he was continuing to talk to/give money to other girls

Broke up with boyfriend but continuing to live in same area, moving in with a friend for my career but spending more time at home with family and attempting to rebuild relationship with family 

Then as I was gaining footing, I discovered my father had been cheating on mother with a woman for 10 years+. I don't want to tell my family because I don't want to break it apart as it was just starting to come together, but I'm being torn apart holding it in

I am feeling completely overwhelmed and looking for advice/where to go from here/past experiences.

I haven't been able to sleep properly or eat because I'm assuming I've been too much on edge.

I be seeking professional help but I need to sort out my work schedule (working almost 7 days a week) 

Thank you 

(edited to include more detail)

[Zed1]

Hi there,

You have been through a lot in a short amount of time. Do you know what stands out for me though?
The fact you have looked for a way to reach out and communicate that you feel like you are drowning. It shows to me personally that you are stonger and learning from these experiences.
Good on you for working in a area during COVID. You continued through it even though you had personal issues going on.

Read over your post again and realise what you have been through is hard and alot but you still have the strength and maturity to reach out.

[Mish_]

Thank you for your response. I read through my post again and it does come across that way. I'll try to look towards that positive light. However, I feel like I'm trying to hold everything in and it will could fall apart at any moment. I'm struggling to take care of myself.. can't bring myself to eat more than a meal or sleep more than a couple hours.

[Sphinxly]

Hey there @Zed1  and @Mish_ ,

I wanted to let you know, if you type @ and click on the member's name in the list you are replying to they will get a notification of your reply 🙂 

Kindly,

Sphinxly🐣

[Sphinxly]

Welcome to the forums @Mish_  

I'm glad you're sharing your concerns with us as it sounds like you are going through a lot right now! I am sure the forum community will be able to offer you some support and connection.

If you ever wanted to speak or chat with a counsellor you are welcome to contact the SANE Help Centre on 1800 18 7263 (Mon-Fri, 10am-10pm).

Take care,

Sphinxly🐣

[Mish_]

Thanks @Sphinxly,

I will keep that in mind in case I do need it. It's comforting knowing that I have somewhere to turn to if things get out of hand.