28-12-2018 11:35 AM
I will add to this list - or maybe someone else will -
I ring Life Line myself from time to time - and there have been varying responses but because there are those times when it doesn't seem to be working I have thought to ive my thoughts an airing on the subject and make a list about how to get the best out of it
First - sit and think about your call and what your main issue is at that given moment - and maybe there are times when you just can't do that - but if you are just battling - work out the hardest thing that day - remember - you can always ring back later
And try and stick to that point - the person on the other end of the line might be taking notes but if they are not they can get a bit confused - so there is no need to tell your whole story - I think they already know that when we ring we have more issues we not need to address this time
Try and ring when the lines are not likely to be busy - the person receiving your call can give you a little more time then -
Ring during the day if possible - if you need to ring in the middle of the night - yes - been there and know how desperate we can be in the early hours - expect the call to be short - people working the lines might need to go home - and toward morning they are tired too - the best time to ring is when the day shifts start - the other person is fresh then
If you feel the call is not going well - it is better for your self-esteem if you end the call yourself - you can ring back straight away and maybe it will be a better deal for both of you -
Remember the person at the other end might have dealt with any kind of drama before you rang - might be really tired - maybe they don't really understand your issue - whatever - some calls just don't work out
But there is always time for another call -
Using these ideas I find I normally get a really good response and a lot of help from Life Line and recommend the service -
And of course - there will be the person who is timing the call and tends to stop you - sometimes it feels like mid-sentence - that is hard to take - a degree of dignity is required - as I have said several times - you can always ring back
All the best with Life Line everyone -
28-12-2018 01:43 PM - edited 28-12-2018 01:45 PM
A much needed subject for a thread.
Thank you yet again Dec..
I only started using lifeline in the last 10 years.
I would not have dreamed that my pain would be worthy or valid before then.
If only someone had put the idea in my head during all the years of domestic abuse...I still struggle writing those words..
I might have found the courage to leave earlier...I found it in the end with the support of therapists and that is what counts.
Lifeline has improved in the last couple of years also.
Yes there are some volunteers who come across as uncaring...blunt...judgemental...I tell them that I do not find them supportive and that I am hanging up. Sadly I did get the same person again once. I did ring back again and found someone with whom I felt safe.
Sometimes I ring and end up saying that I don't know what to say I just need to know that someone is there for me..Most are very understanding of this and reassuring...
It does not always take away the feelings...distraction and hearing another's voice does help to a certain degree...
Advice I would give to others...
The service is there 24 hours every day for all of us even if we might not feel that we are worthy of a listening ear...
Make the call...hang up if it does not help...Ring again..
If it helps ...later you feel the need again...ring again as many times as you need to...you do matter...
Lastly no matter how distressed or angry we might be...it is very important not to take those feelings out on the person at the other end of the line....Many of those people have had their own life experiences also.
28-12-2018 01:51 PM
I wrote an lengthy response before..
Yet again it has gone missing.
Cannot find it in rejected or other pile..
So do not have the energy to reply again.
Thank you though...a much needed subject..
28-12-2018 03:08 PM
30-12-2018 11:10 AM
I'm sorry you lost your thoughtful post - sigh - it is never the short comments that disappear - only those we feel as if we have given birth too - but thanks for writing it anyway - it means something to know that you did put a lot into it -
And thanks for your comments too @outlander
I just hope people can get some help from these suggestions - one think I really find frustrating is being cut off because the time is up - I guess some people are hard to get off the line but I usually end the conversation myself - which is good for the way I feel about the whole thing
I have worked one a help-line - many years ago - I liked to give people as long as they seemed to need but it was not busy then - it wasn't Life Line
I have nothing but praise for Life Line
Really - my New Year idea for every - my best thought or idea - may your Life Line calls work well for you
30-12-2018 11:55 AM
Thanks @Dec. I've never called them but it's helpful to hear from people with experience doing it. Takes some of the fear out of the unknown.
30-12-2018 12:17 PM
I hope you can get over your fear of the unknown and call them when you need to @TheVorticon - talking with someone who doesn't know you and is there just to listen to you is one way of dealing with the bad times when something happens to tip things over for all of us
Do I ever know that feeling - btw - it does get easier to deal with as I get older
All the best for the New Year
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