17-05-2018 10:22 PM
18-05-2018 12:29 AM
Your post was serious and made me laugh. @Whiteknight Thanks
I am lousy at boundaries, but familiar with the concept of an Interior Castle through the witings of the spanish mystic Teresa of Avila. My gatekeeper is a bit slow but learning to weed out toxic situations.
18-05-2018 08:03 PM
Many people without MI have boundaries. Ever said the wrong thing and someone jumps down your throat? Seemingly innocently shortening a childs name can receive the wrath from the parent- automatic boundary.
Yet we dont commonly have them- why not? Maybe we are weaker in terms of mental strength, we dont like upsetting others causing conflict or we are aware of any behaviour could be construed as being a MI mood or similar. The result however of not having boundaries is people think we are easy going, take comments at the bbq as "water off a ducks back" only to drown in our tears later on as they drive off down the driveway.
Humans have boundaries everywhere. Road rules, public places, dog restrictions, laws everywhere restricting our movements. Having no boundaries is IMO not protecting us. Our country could be taken over in days if we didnt have a defence force.
18-05-2018 09:55 PM
Another interesting thread I thoroughly enjoyed @Whiteknight - thanks for sharing.
My fortesss of mind is believing in myself and having faith. And very similar to what has been said - only allowing my thoughts to focus on what matters to me in life - and allow it to focus on only "who matters" and what is important. The rest is not important. That keeps my mind on the right track. I keep at arms length toxic/ fake and disrespectful people and situations which I am now in control with as opposed to my abusive childhood. It's liberating.
18-05-2018 10:55 PM
"Liberating". What a magnificent word. There was even a WW2 bomber called the "liberator"
An abusive childhood will effect us all our lives, thats a given, but when we organise our lives so we can accommodate boundaries, we get bouyed by the changes we put in place that work.
For me I didnt have my fortress of survival in place and needed it badly. I was exposed, vulnerable and a target for the cruel and bullying and narcissists out there.
Good answer Enigma. Thanks