I can’t cope

[Captain24]

I’m now packed as much as I can. @rav3n. Just a few things like hairdryer, straightener, brushes, chargers and meds to go. 

Now to dust the lounge room. 

[rav3n]

@Captain24 yayy! one down, one to go!

the weather tends to be colder/windier near the beach side right? hmm that's tough. do you like leggings? what do you reckon you'll go with?

my list:

• add at least 3 more ideas to doc1
• add at least 1 idea to doc 2
• write a draft in doc 1

will let you know how i go with my tasks soon. i find it helpful having someone check-in on me too, we got this!!

[Captain24]

Lounge room dusted @rav3n. It took a lot of self talk. Now to clean the windows that I can reach, then the sliding door. Some windows are behind the lounge and it’s too big to move. 

It’ll be windier but probably warmer temperature wise. The wind will be cold though. I’m going to the edge of some cliffs so the water will (hopefully) be splashing. I’ll take photos! I have trouble with leggings as I have a big belly and everything slides under it. I’ll just have to deal with the jeans and joggers. I’ll wear a rugby top so it won’t look as bad. I get really self conscious that everyone is looking at me and judging me. Then it raises my anxiety. 

How are you going? 

[rav3n]

@Captain24 great work!! oh gosh i'm not a fan window cleaning, i'm short as well so i gotta use a lil stool to get the top parts.

ahh i see, those would not be comfy! i hate the wet feeling of water on my jeans! hopefully the splashes aren't too wild, and yes would love to see pics!!

i've added 3 ideas to doc 1,  and i'm half way through the draft write up. still gotta do the doc 2 stuff, less than an hour to go!

[Captain24]

I did it @rav3n. The windows and the sliding door are all clean in the inside! Everything I said I’d do is done! Thank you so much. I couldn’t have done it without you. The only thing left inside my house is one spare room but I can’t do that until I get back and the walk-in. I really need to tackle that tomorrow and sort out cleaning the car. I may need some help! 

I’ll post pics when I get back and say where they were. Plus my motel room for two nights has ocean views! I hate wet jeans too but I’ll just have to deal with it. Hopefully they don’t get too wet as I’m a pair short for the days I’ll be away!

You're going so well. Half a draft and one idea to go. You got this! 

[rav3n]

so so proud of ya @Captain24!! i'll be around tomorrow if you'd like an accountability buddy 😊

i JUST finished my list too, was a minute over my deadline but at least it's done hehe!

ocean views are the best, so lucky!! i'm off for tonight, take care. i'll see ya tomorrow 💙

[Captain24]

Yes please @rav3n. It helps me so so much. Just to know that I’m being held accountable. 

Yay for getting it all done! It must be hard when dealing with us as well. You did well. 

Thanks again.

[Captain24]

Just ordered takeaway for dinner. I think I deserve it after having such a bad morning and failing miserably but getting everything done this afternoon. Especially when afternoons aren’t my thing. 

[Captain24]

I did so much this afternoon. However I’m beating myself up that I slept so much this morning. I could have gotten so much more done. I’m feeling pretty stupid and disgusted in myself. 

Will I ever get to the point where I’ll stop pushing myself? Will I ever get to the point with being ok? Will I ever get easier on myself? 

[Ru-bee]

Hey @Captain24 good on you for getting stuff done today, and  huge good on you for recognising your efforts and giving yourself a bit of a pat on the back! I'm hearing that you're not feeling so good about it now but I think it's important that you were able to celebrate that win at all. Maybe it's a step forward and being able to go easier on yourself will come incrementally. Maybe next time you'll be able to celebrate the win a little longer

What did you end up getting for dinner?