I can’t cope

[AuntGlow]

Hi @Captain24,

What movie had you feeling so much? 🥰

[Captain24]

‘The art of driving in the rain’ @AuntGlow. It’s a feel good movie but I just can’t stop crying. I know I needed to let it out but now I just can’t stop. I feel so broken. It’s not from the movie it’s just what set me off. I knew I was broken but have just been pushing it down. I knew I was on the verge of a breakdown. I’m holding my babies close. 

[AuntGlow]

Aw, lovely. @Captain24 

I know it's hard when something triggers big emotions, but I also think it can be so cathartic and healing to hold space for those feelings. Connecting to ourselves that deeply can be a lot, but it certainly doesn't mean you are broken - I think it simply shows where you need a little more love and nurturing? 

Holding your babies sounds really soothing. 

What else do you need right now? 💛

[Captain24]

I’m still crying but not sobbing anymore @AuntGlow 

I feel broken. 

I don’t know what I need. Really I just want love and support. To know that someone really does care about me. 

[AuntGlow]

I understand this feeling... @Captain24 

When you consider love and support, does anyone or anything come to mind?

I know that it isn't in person, but I really hope you feel a sense of genuine care from us over here - because we do care and want to support you. 💛

[Captain24]

No nothing comes to mind. I would just love to find some love and comfort @AuntGlow 

Sometimes I feel the care and support but not always. 

[tyme]

Well, hello there @Captain24  🙂

How's everything? 

I know I said I felt lost the other day, but tonight I feel I'm buzzing a little. Too much coffee???

This morning I went to Starbucks and got a Venti latte.... I can feel that the caffeine is not agreeing with me. 

I then went through the car wash.

Then I went to church.

Then I visited someone and had a cuppa.

Then I did some admin work, and I'm here now.

You?

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

One extreme to the other. Is the buzzing good though?

Sounds like you have had a nice and productive balanced self care day. 

I cleaned under the kitchen sink and cleaned the house. So not much. Oh and I got rid of all the rubbish out the back like the old hose and soaker hoses that didn’t survive winter. 

Then watched a couple of movies. One made me cry, it was heartfelt but shouldn’t have made me cry to the extent that I was sobbing. I felt broken. I’ve been pushing it down but it all came out. I know that I’m broken but was just hiding it from everyone, myself included. 

I just really want some love and support right now but have nowhere to get it from. I check in on people, they don’t check in on me. 

Oh.. you know how I was suppose to have lunch yesterday with my bestie? I didn’t really want to as town was so busy but she didn’t even remember. I feel really hurt. 

I have no one and feel so alone, broken and shattered. 

[AuntGlow]

I get this and it's so human to want and need a sense of love and comfort. It sounds like you felt that way with your friend the other day... is there an opportunity to connect with her tonight at all? @Captain24 

Well, we are here for you and happy to talk (I will keep reminding you of this!). 💛

[Captain24]

I don’t want to bother her she has a lot in and has been really busy this weekend @AuntGlow 

Probably will need a little convincing tonight. Feeling to difficult