Peer Group Chat // The Misconception of Connection // Thursday 25th May 2023, 7-8:30PM AEST

[amber22]

Hello! 

On Thursday 25th of May 2023, we will be holding a Peer Group Chat on the topic of The Misconception of Connection.

Despite a perceived increase of connecting within a technological world, loneliness and isolation are still a constant presence within our lives. There can be different experiences and definitions of loneliness for everyone, such as being surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Let’s come together to share our experiences of loneliness, isolation, and connection. 

The event start times across Australia are below:

Western Australia: 5pm 
Northern Territory & South Australia: 6:30pm 

Queensland, New South Wales, Australian Capital Territory, Victoria & Tasmania: 7pm

For anyone unfamiliar with Peer Group Chats, each focuses on a specific topic and is guided by Peer Workers with lived experience of mental health issues and recovery, &/or caring for someone with complex mental health. A counsellor is also present as a moderator to help ensure a safe environment for individuals and the group. It is a space for us as peers to share our stories and experiences, and connect with those who are going through something similar. 

Anyone is welcome to join! Tagging some members who may be interested below: 
@Shaz51 @Snowie @Meggle @Appleblossom @Bobbie @sammy3 @Jacques @chibam @creative_writer @Captain24 @Down2 @Gillie1 @Adge @tonys @wellwellwellnez @Laura4 @Messylife @tonys @Bow @Appleblossom @ParentingOCD @Smiling_Gecko 

Peer Group Chats are hosted outside of the forums, using a platform called Chatwee. 

To join an Online Peer Group and participate, you will need to register for an account with Chatwee.
To access the group to observe only and not participate, you can access Chatwee as a Guest.
On the night, follow this link to access Chatwee before the group starts.
You can join our Peer Group Chats every Thursday from 7:00-8:30pm (AEDT). Check out the FAQs page for more information.  

We hope to see you there 😊 If you can't make it but are interested, you can always catch up reading the transcript afterwards here. We also invite you to continue the conversation below on this thread if you can't make the night but also wish to contribute some of your responses. We will post some dot point prompts on the day that can get the conversation started if you're unable to make the live event!

[TideisTurning]

Hi Everyone, 

Just a reminder that the next Online Peer Group Chat on The Misconception of Connection will take place tonight from 7-8:30pm AEST.  As always, for ease of reference, times across Australia are in the graphic and listed below: 

Western Australia: 5pm 
Northern Territory & South Australia: 6:30pm 

Queensland, New South Wales, Australian Capital Territory, Victoria & Tasmania: 7pm 

Tonight, you can expect discussion about: 

• Our experiences of isolation & loneliness + different definitions of isolation, loneliness and connection 
•  The impact of technology on our sense of connection 
• What meaningful connection might look like & how we could improve it 

Tagging members who have supported or otherwise interacted with the thread so far as well as those who may be interested to receive a reminder: @Oaktree @Snowie @Shaz51 @Bobbie @Former-Member @CloudBerry @Jacques @Appleblossom @chibam @creative_writer @Captain24 @Birdofparadise8 

[Oaktree]

@TideisTurning 

I already had my alarm set. See you tonight.

Meggle

[amber22]

Hi Everyone, 

Just a reminder that this Peer Group Chat on the topic of The Misconception of Connection will be starting very soon, in around 20 minutes at 7PM AEST! Tagging those who have interacted with the thread and who may be online and/or interested to receive a reminder 🙂 

@Shaz51 @Snowie @Appleblossom @Bow @CrazyChick @Emergence @Gillie1 @Kyle1 @Laura4 @Maladict @StuF @chibam @sol_87 @Determined @Historylover @Meowmy @Smiling_Gecko @outlander @Lettuce @Jay5 @greenpea @David_888 @Fifi01 @Dimity @Little_Leopard @Lozza42 @Meggle @Tryingtocope52 @justanotherguy @Delicatessen @creative_writer @Oaktree @Captain24 

[Snowie]

Hi @TideisTurning 

I wish I could make it tonight but I need to put my MH first.

Hope it goes well.

[TideisTurning]

Hi Everyone,

Following our discussion last week, I'm really curious to hear from all of you about the impacts of technology on connection, because I have a suspicion that technology is not necessarily all bad, nor is it all good either. So, what do y’all see as the potential pros and cons of technology in relation to connection?

As an example to start us off, for me, I can see this forum as a huge pro that allows all of us to connect with each other. However, I also stopped engaging with social media a few years ago because of how disconnected it made me feel from loved ones. People I thought were close to me wouldn't necessarily tell me about what was happening in their lives, preferring instead for me to read about it online. I’ve also known someone who has a preference for public social media messages wishing them happy birthday then in person verbal good wishes, even snapping at their partner for saying ‘happy birthday’ instead of posting publicly. For me, both of these kinds of occurrences feel really impersonal and for me, lead to a feeling of disconnection between me and other loved ones. While the choice not to engage in social media has something of a cost in some ways, for me, the benefits of being able to connect more personally with loved ones outweigh the prices that come with not engaging. 

In considering your own perspectives, this talk on how technology may be separating us and on the effects of friendship on the brain may be a little more food for thought 😊

@Birdofparadise8 @Snowie @Oaktree @chibam @Appleblossom @creative_writer @Shaz51 

[Appleblossom]

I am glad to see your discussion @TideisTurning I am skeptical about much of the so called "connectedness" involved in use of technology. Yes I have valued the forum and even some overseas connections on social media. However the general lack of real understanding of being human and decline in standards of discussion seem problematic to me.  I am committed to in person connection where I can. I do not like the concept of checking google for the last word ... seems petty, although I appreciate people who bother to do the research.  Anyway my views are probably no surprise.

[Oaktree]

Hi @TideisTurning @amber22 @Appleblossom 

Whilst I love the space the forums gives us and the real connections we make here, I think I would prefer some real life friends to connect with. I am a hugger and need that tactile touch.

I think technology can be problematic whilst socialising in person because you are together yet both staring at your phones. I find this a bit rude and it impedes socialisation. 

Technology can be both good and bad depending on how you use it.

Meggle

[chibam]

So much to say, @TideisTurning ...

I like to think that mental health essentially boils down to two general tasks:

1. Preventing/minimizing bad things
2. Cultivating good things, or 'reasons to live'

Generally speaking, I think that the role technology has played thus far in human socialization has been to perform the first task fairly well. But it has shown little capacity to create anything meaningful. Technology has helped up (to a large degree) escape the hollow and burdensome relationships we've had with other humans, but it generally hasn't led to (nor replaced) meaningful relationships with other humans.

We're all familiar with the common complaint that "these days everybody is glued to their phone!" Why is that? Because the phone provides a more desirable and life-affirming experience then whatever (or whoever) is really around them at that given moment. It serves as a firewall against the more toxic and burdensome elements of human socialization (which, if we're being honest, make up probably the majority of raw time spent in socialization, doesn't it?)

I was at a boring family function a few years ago. One of the teenagers was there, glued to her phone the whole time, and I couldn't help but envy her that. None of us wanted to be there; but she had an avenue that aloud her to get the brownie points for showing up, without actually having to be conscious of what was going on there.

But, that being said, these devices don't actually create meaningful connections. So, if your going to any sort of social situation in hopes that your gonna get set up with someone who is actually good company, you have to avoid coming off as someone who is obsessed with technology, and send out all the appropriate signals that you are aching for a real, meaningful human relationship. The trouble with that is, how do you maximize your odds of ending up with someone who's company you'll actually enjoy, rather then someone who'll leave you aching for a phone/TV/ect. you can use to drown them out with.

I can cite dozens of similar examples of how technology is good for suppressing bad social situations, yet none of how it is genuinely helpful.

I could also get into a discussion of the potential for AI to revolutionize our lives in this area, but that's a whole nother discussion.

[chibam]

@TideisTurningOne last thought: I am very concerned about the perceptions of the value of technology amongst our leadership caste, i.e. government and the top tiers of the various mental health organizations out there. I think a lot of them see technology as a solution for a lot of problems, and subsequently devote an excessive amount of money and policy support towards it. When in reality, what we really need is more focus from these leaders towards creating and cultivating real life connections.

Some of the stuff I read from these policymakers makes me feel as if their as clueless as can be. I think that the message really needs to be hammered home hard during policy discussion that technology is, at best, a stopgap solution and that there is no substitute for meaningful direct human connection.

I'm not sure what prompted your initial question, but if it has anything to do with SANE wanting to check the community temperature in the course of developing their own policy reccommendations for government, ect., then this might be something you want to keep in mind.