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[ArraDreaming]

Sorry @Shaz51 I missed your comments! Yes you would have seen a few things. Yikes! 

[tyme]

Arghhhhh @Shaz51 ! Kids are a walking liability. I also remember a kid once getting their head stuck between the posts of a fence... the fire brigade had to come....

@ArraDreaming - I'm also glad your son didn't have injuries to the face! So dangerous! Hopefully a Bluey episode will have a moral about listening to parents lol. Otherwise, you may as well write into Bluey productions and ask them for an episode....

As for socialising? I guess there are a lot of things in life we prefer not to do because it's just easier that way. However, if I didn't push myself to do some of these things, I wouldn't be at the stage of recovery I am now. 

As I think about it, this is the same for things that I instinctively do, but know I shouldn't do - like getting angry and lashing out. Only yesterday, I shared that I was very very angry about something.... to the point of tears. In the past, I did get physical... but not anymore. However, after being angry yesterday, I really regretted the things I said and did....

So you see, as part of recovery, I really still need to push myself outside my comfort zone. It's a daily thing - and I don't think this will stop anytime soon...

[ArraDreaming]

Your not alone with the anger, I have also suffered with a very bad temper and serious anger issues for many years but the same as you, I have grown a lot and I am no longer as easily wound up or get physical like I used to. I think the reason for this and I’m not sure if you’re the same, but when I started noticing shifts in my general mental health/wellbeing I noticed that when I woke up I was no longer waking up at a level 8,9 or even 10 first thing in the morning, where it would take very little to tip me over the edge, I was always running at a high level ready to snap, but as i recovered more I started waking up as a 1 or 2 in the morning, I wasn’t on edge, overwhelmed, hypervigilent from the minute I woke up anymore. I don’t mean to make this about me! I just want to say I can relate! @tyme 

[ArraDreaming]

I still have my days though, but not a physical ever anymore

[ArraDreaming]

I’m also starting to write a formal complain to a service that I feel I was mistreated by about 4 years ago, granted I was in a much worse state back then but I didn’t deserve what happened to me and as I have grown since then I can reflect on my own actions and their actions and I’d like to take it further, respectfally and properly. I wrote a complaint at the time but it was definitely fueled by emotions/anger

[tyme]

Thank you for sharing @ArraDreaming - please don't say sorry for posting that. I think it's incredible to know how far you've come. And to learn that you've found ways to manage the anger.

Yes, age plays a part, but it's more so the experiences and strategies we develop over time. Much of it has come from our upbringing. For me, I was extremely oppressed as a child and was not allowed to show anger. Hence, my anger boiled up inside. 

As an adult, I had to be taught healthier ways of expressing anger rather than become violent.

I don't often wake up angry, but I turn and get angry at the smallest of things. Sleep actually takes the anger away - but to sleep when angry? LOL... not as easy at it sounds!

Please do keep sharing (as much as you are comfortable doing) 🙂

[ArraDreaming]

Yeah! That’s what I meant, not waking up angry but waking up in a state that made me very easily angry/wound up @tyme 

[tyme]

@ArraDreaming ,

Believe it or not, I've done that in the past as well. However, my complaint was not fueled by anger. 

I wrote to the MH commission. They replied so respectfully and escalated my concerns to AHPRA. 

In my letter, I made it very clear that I was not making the complaint to get anyone in trouble, or to seek compensation... rather, it was to raise awareness of what is happening in services so that the same mistreatment does not occur to others.

In the end, all my points were taken seriously. Recommendations were made to the service by the MH commission. Then I received a letter from the service stating that they had actioned all the recommendations.

I was quite pleased with the result. But it was also a very stressful time.

I hope you will also be able to make change from your letter.

[ArraDreaming]

I think that’s the aim I am taking from this, for the service to be aware of how much it affected me and what could have been done differently from my perspective, whereas at the time I wrote a complaint but it was pretty reactive. I will give it a shot. Just jotting down my ideas/ thoughts @tyme 

[tyme]

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@ArraDreaming wrote:

Yeah! That’s what I meant, not waking up angry but waking up in a state that made me very easily angry/wound up @tyme 

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Makes a lot of sense @ArraDreaming  - it's so good to hear - honestly 🙂

Maybe kids jumping into your bed in the mornings asking for Cheerios puts a smile on your face?